Once upon a time, I tried to get a community project going called “Sunday Swoon”. It was meant to be a showcase of the things that made us super chuffed and proud. Once a week, show off your shiny.
It didn’t land. At the time, I didn’t get why, but I think I’ve figured it out.
We are not accustomed to, nor really ever encouraged to toot our own horns. If we do say “I’m proud of this”, there is probably a little voice in our heads (mine sounds like my mother) saying “You’re getting too big for your britches.”
If we do exclaim about something we did that rocks, we are prone to minimizing it. “I made this, but it sucks.” or “I did this thing, but it’s no big deal.” You know this is true. You’ve done this yourself. I know you have.
On Fridays, when I’m not hosting a blog along, I do something called “Friday Five”. It is a curated collection of things that are delighting me. Sometimes I include *my own things* in that list, because some of the things I do delight me. But. I will often find myself feeling a little touch uncomfortable about it. Like, I can brag, but only so much before my conditioning kicks in.
I am very interested in shame busting (my own, and yours) & make a practice of being as puffed up and proud as I am *entitled to be*. It’s part of my recovery from childhood abuse, and low self-esteem. It might seem like I’m arrogant or full of ego, but this is actually an antidote to the opposite issue. I, like many survivours of child abuse, have a core of self-loathing that is very difficult to identify and root out.
So, I’m going to bring back Sunday Swoon. Even if no one ever participates. Because, listen. We deserve our own props. We have earned the right to say “I’m proud of this thing. I did this thing I love. I am awesome.” I know I’ve earned that right. And doing it, out loud, in a very sort of public way is very healing & revealing. What am I tempted to brag about in a *falsely humble way*? How can I nip that in the bud. What am I disclaiming or minimizing? How can I just say “I rocked this” without being overwhelmed with the ‘who do you think you are’ voices in my head.
I did a lot of work on this in a session of Seven Sins with Renee Magnusson. I got stuck on one of the sins (wrath, that tricksy sin!), so I’ll be repeating it in the next round. The tour starts with pride, and the work I did in that one section of this seven section tour was *incredibly revealing*. I used to disclaim so much, you know? People would say I was so strong, and I’d say “well, I had no choice.” Yeah, I did. I totally did. I *am* strong, so now when someone says “You’re so strong!” I say *THANK YOU*. Period. End of.
Anyway, you might want to look at the tour if you feel called to root out some of the ways you deny yourself the right to *exist* on the planet.
In celebration of my newfound love of being prideful as fuck, I am going to dust off this pretty graphic, and I’m going to swoon *over myself*. I invite you to do the same. Every Sunday. Share something (either in your own spaces, or here in the comments, if that feels safer) that you did that you are happy about, proud of, impressed with, etc.
This Sunday’s Shiny
I made this. Isn’t it gorgeous?
See? It’s that easy.
Your turn.
xo
Effy
Today’s Nudge: Show off without apologizing.
Optional nudge: Start a blog series that you can commit to updating regularly that will help you build your community.
There’s a bunch of us blogging along in September. Find out more here, or pop your email address in the box below, and I’ll send you a nudge to blog every day along with a link to my daily writings.
P.S. LIFE BOOK 2018 is open for registration, y’all! Early Bird ends December 31st, so get it while you can!
I’m proud as fuck of my four sons. Because after my mother being as she was, I wouldn’t sure as hell repeat the same patterns. When I look at them and see how they manage in life, I think I succeeded.
Oh, yes. <3 I feel this, and fyi, re your blog today - we have that in common. <3
I love the idea of Sunday swoon, abso-blooming-lutely, I had almost forgotten how uncomfortable compliments used to make me, I still get the odd twinge but, accepting a compliment, is accepting a gift from someone and if someone gave you a gift you wouldn’t dismiss it, throw a gift from someone in the trash in front of them, it takes some getting used to but like you so wonderfully expressed it is so important and giving ourselves compliments and accepting them and when I figure the copy paste thingymajig out I will happily join in Sunday swoon…… Oooooh I feel all strong and positive about this ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
I think it will be really good practice for us, eh? :D
I am proud about a Tarot course I’ve created. All my love went into creating a small, sweet little course to help people new to Tarot take their very first steps on the Tarot journey. Its going to be up by next week – promotions/teasers started today on Instagram! :-)
Ooooh, that sounds very intriguing! Will you post the URL in the next Sunday Shiny?
You’ve pique my interest! :)
Oooh that sounds interesting ♥️
That sounds awesome!! Congratulations!
I love it.
Mwah!
I loved reading your Sunday Swoon posts. I’m so glad you are bringing them back. Maybe I’ll have something to post about sometimes and I’ll be able to join you.
I hope you do! <3
I got my latest Hba1c test (shows your average blood glucose level over the past here months) back this week, and since Feb I have brought my number down from 9.2 (very alarming) to 7.3 (just where I should be for my age). Hurrah me!
Good for you, Sandra Whisper! I’m always impressed by people who are very proactive about taking care of themselves, because there are honestly a lot of people who don’t! So yay you!
YAY! That is really swoon worthy!! <3
I love the Sunday Swoon idea and I’ll join in for sure. I’m swooning over the fact that I made and canned grape juice using the grapes from our vines for the first time this year and it looks beautiful all pinkish purple in the glass jars with the grapes still floating in it. As to taste, I won’t know for six weeks, but I’ll love looking at them until then.
I would dearly love to see a picture of those jars. <3! I bet they're beautiful!
It’s Looking Lovely.
Thank you. xo
I spent the afternoon sorting beads…thousands of them given to me by a friend who said “I’ll never use these but you’ll find a use for them”… yes, I will… I teach jewelry classes at 4-H camp…and that’s where some of these will go… and I’ll figure out some other good uses for them!! These are plastic beads and I use very few plastic beads in my jewelry making, but that could change! I also started two small 6×6 collages to donate to a fundraiser… and I have been hired to teach a class on making Christmas ornaments… yes, these beads will find many homes!! That was my Sunday!
Oh, that’s fantastic! It must feel like Christmas at your house right now. <3
I like the idea of Sunday Swoon because it will be fun to read what people share; although it will be a stretch for me (I like stretching, sometimes).
Yes!! Your graphic is absolutely gorgeous – as is all of the work that you do!!
Stretching is soooo good for us. :D <3
Love this Effy! Thanks for setting an example for us that pride is not a negative.
this is a great idea :D we all should be proud of the things we do because if we aren’t, whats the point?
Looking forward to it Effy. Will have something for next Sunday. Signed up for your free class too. Loved what you taught in Bad Ass Art Journaling. one of my favorite pages in my journal. thanks as always for sharing.