I. I do purse dumps like this whenever I have no idea how to reemerge from a long period of silence. It is just like dumping a purse out on the table so you can get rid of the old balls of Kleenex, the empty box of Altoids, the lipstick you no longer wear, the receipts you shoved in there when you were in a hurry. A purse dump lets you clear out the crumbs and detritus that you accumulate in day-to-day life. My brain is a lot like a purse. If I don’t dump it out now and then, I find it crammed full of crap I no longer need.
II. June was hard in my world. Lots of “anniversary” triggers had me crawling back to therapy with my tail tucked between my legs. The flight from my place of residence last year, the fact that my usual home fest was not happening AGAIN, missing people I love who I will most likely never see again – it was all a bit much for me so I hunkered down and did my own work. I was quiet in all my places but most especially here.
III. Therapy is helping and I am keeping my chin up. TikTok is also helping. Like, a lot. It is so much fun and I hope you’ll connect with me there. I’m @effywild.
IV. I’m feeling cute lately. I got my second jab last week, so maybe it’s the 5G glow, but whatever it is, I’ll take it. It’s nice to look in the mirror and see a self I enjoy looking at. Also, my hair has *never been this long* since I was, like, 9? So I’m starting to think about my hair as a thing I might style.
V. I am caught up with work and that feels amazing, but my house-elf has been super busy (as have I) so the house is trashed. I am thinking about doing something about that today. There is a massive pile of dishes to do and a lot of crap that just gets tossed on various surfaces because I’m doing everything I can to stay ahead of the work list.
It’s not too bad, though. Like, it’s not a depression nest so much as it is just a neglected due to extreme list slaying nest.
VI. I miss writing here, but I have to accept that when I’m very down as I was through the early part of this summer, I can’t bring myself to force it. So, I’m inconsistent. And that’s ok.
VII. I recently binged The Morning Show and The Wilds – both on Prime. Loved them both, and I’m looking forward to new seasons of both (whenever that happens).
VIII. I’ve had brunch out twice with girlfriends since July 1st, and that’s been grand. We are entering phase 3 of our opening on the 16th, and that is also hopeful and exciting! Hair cuts! Movies! Life! Let’s get after it!
IX. I took a nice long walk down by the river a couple of days ago and it was a balm on my soul. It’s been rainy and really chilly ever since, though, so I’ve not made it a habit yet. I want to, but I want to be warm and dry when taking in the sights and sounds of The Thames, not chilly and damp. There’s been so much rain lately, and while I love thunderstorms, it is kind of putting a cramp in my desire to get out into the world on foot and explore the city I moved to last year.
X. There. Back on the horse. Did you miss me? I missed you. xo
P.S. This is going up on Patreon on the 15th of this month. She’s called “The Ground Of Being Is A Mother”. I love her.
This is going up in Kaleidoscope 2021 in August.
This went up in Book Of Days on July 1st
So, yanno. Art is happening. Yay!