I did a live gathering with my art witches on Saturday during which we went over the review we do in Moonshine now and again. It came up this month because we’re in the halfway point of the program and I thought it would be a good opportunity to assess how things are going for each of us as individuals within the context of the intense work we do in our efforts to embrace our own power. Because “reviews” can be something we bash ourselves over the heads with, I did my own review out loud so I could model how I do it gently and with oodles of self-empathy.

It was tender. Stuff came up that I wasn’t even aware of – stuff that wanted to be tended to, and while it’s likely that this stuff would have come up eventually, doing the review meant I didn’t have to wait for it to fester before I became aware of it. It came up *before* it was an emergency.

And that’s why I appreciate doing things like “reviews” or keeping a practice of checking in with myself or taking personal inventories of my own stuff.

It’s not easy for me, though, so don’t read me wrong and think I’ve got this all figured out! I’m great at staying too busy to think much as a coping mechanism, and I catch myself defaulting to that a lot more than I’d like, but I also know that if I’m taking my own temperature regularly, I can avoid the inevitable crisis that comes for me if I’m not taking my temperature.

Taking my temperature on Saturday let me know that I’ve got some work to do around my right to exist, matter, receive acknowledgment & validation, and take up space. Still. Heh.

It let me know that I’m finding it difficult to feel “legitimate”, adulty, and self-possessed.

It let me know that there are a couple of voices in my head that need to be evicted because they’re a) old tape and b) terribly unkind.

And now I know, so I’m going to work on *waves at all of that*.

***

It’s Monday, so I’ve got Journal52 floating around in all my places. You can grab it here, too, if you’d prefer not to wait for the email or the post to go up elsewhere. It’s hosted on Dropbox.

I don’t know how much time I’m going to have for the bloggy thingy over the course of the next few days since I’m preparing to go to fest on the 15th. I’m slowly inching towards being all caught up with all the things that got lost in the fray that was COVID and recovering from COVID and that feels *amazing*, but I am still feeling pressed and anxious because I have deadlines and errands up to my eyeballs, so oh hey! Wish me luck?

I’ll see you soon,

Effy

P.S. This week’s art card was created from a macro of this piece, which I made for Make Create Express! I just *love* her, and I’m excited to present her to you so you can make your own!

 

 

 

 

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