It has been a crazy long while because, true to form, I bit off more than I could chew, but I’m CRAZY HAPPY, so I’m okay with the sore jaw and the omg WHERE IS THE TIME GOING???

It’s going to good purpose.

That’s all I ever really need to know.

I have a gift for you.

I am neck deep in teaching Moonshine: Mixed Media Encounters With The Divine Feminine and my goddesses and I are in the trenches together, making colour wheels, talking supplies, looking to our own faces for ‘data’ about where our faces protrude and where they recede. You know ~ beginner stuff!

And some of our goddesses are making attempts at doing things that even MASTERS struggle with.

I wrote this for them this morning, but I wanted to share it with you, because I think this is not spoken of enough in our “EVErYTHINg IS sO SHinY” culture. I think we are all hard on ourselves to an abusive degree, and I’d like us to stop.

Read on…

Gordon Ramsey Vs. Julia Child

Lots of you have taken it upon yourselves to attempt sketching your own neutral faces, and you are expressing dismay with the results. Sketching faces from photographs is hard enough when it is a perfectly sculpted face, or a photoshopped-within-an-inch of reality face. Sketching our own faces?

Really freaking hard.

And hard not just in the skill-building sense, but in the hard-on-our-self-esteem sense. Sketching our neutral faces comes with a double whammy of omg, I suck at this stuff + omg, look at that <insert the flaws you perceive in your face> stuff. Neither is good for the budding artist within us, or the tender five year old self we all carry at the core of our adulthood.

This class is about idealized faces ~ iconic portraits. The faces we will be making are reflections of the divine feminine. There is a very important reason for this:

Idealized faces are *easier to create* than realistic faces. They are ideal for beginners. They are perfect to practice on. They are an excellent exercise in skills-building.

While I would never tell you what to do or not do in terms of your desire to learn, I would suggest that starting with realistic faces, especially photographs of ourselves, is a little like starting with gourmet cooking when we don’t yet know how to turn on the stove. We’ve witnessed our Hell’s Kitchen inspired inner critics going all Gordon Ramsey on our asses in the Facebook Group. Right? And how do you feel when you watch someone bash themselves about the head and face for sucking or having ugly features?

Like crap. Because this is tender territory. Our inner five year old’s are thinking “OH NO! IF SHE’S UGLY THEN I MUST BE REALLY UGLY!” Our budding inner artists are thinking “IF SHE THINKS THAT’S CRAP, HOLY CRAP, I’M REALLY CRAP!”

Now we know:

We need a little Julia Child infusion in our group. Julia Child would never swear at us for breaking an egg. She would just move the class into omelet making with grace and humour. She would never freak out at us or swear at us for burning the filet. She’d throw her hands up and say THERE’S ALWAYS THE SALAD…

So, let’s ease off on ourselves. Let’s save the really hard stuff for when we’ve mastered the basics. Let’s remember that the purview of this class is idealized and iconic portraits and if we’re tempted to try advanced techniques, let’s do so with a sense of fun, of play. Let’s not yell at our budding inner artists for *trying*. Let’s not traumatize our already tender inner five year olds with smack talk about our level of attractiveness. Let’s not label our early attempts as ‘failures’. Let’s not label our beautiful selves as ugly.

Deal?

Before you do any more sketching, I want you to take this in. Bookmark it. Make it a habit to watch it regularly. I’m down to once a month or so, but when I first started making art, I was watching this *at least* weekly.

Watch it daily if you need to:

Ira Glass on Storytelling from David Shiyang Liu on Vimeo.

Perfectionism BLOCKS Progress

I honestly didn’t expect to have to tackle this subject until later on when we began painting, but in the spirit of remaining open and flexible to the group’s energy, I want to offer you the benefit of my experience:

When I first began I *sucked at everything*. I sucked like crazy. I couldn’t draw what I saw (and I still can’t) to save my life. I had to learn every skill I’ve got and then I had to practice. I knew I sucked, but I *was okay with it*. I was lucky enough to know that suckage is inevitable when you are a beginner.

If I’d expected to be perfect or even good out of the gate, I would have quit because perfectionism blocks progress. It sets us up to fail.

Because, listen: Perfect doesn’t exist. Even when we measure every facial feature within an nanometer of its existence, there is going to be something *off* in our final product. And guess what? THAT’S AWESOME! Because it is in the flaws that character shines through. It is in the slight crookedness of a grin or the wonkiness of one eye that our faces achieve their humanity.

Compare, for example, a mannequin to a photograph. Mannequins are perfect. They are also creepy. They are imitations of life, and they feel like imitations.

So, forget perfect. Go for progress. Progress moves us forward. Every time you practice, you are *bound to get better*. A first attempt will suck, but it is also medal-worthy, because DUDE! YOU TRIED! And you are going to keep trying until you are HAPPY with what you produce.

Trying Is Winning

Learning to create faces that make us happy is an exercise in trying. We will produce a lot of crap, but it is COMPOST crap, not shit-on-the-bottom-of-our-shoe crap. It is the kind of crap from whence roses grow. Let us honour that. Making crap leads to making not so crappy leads to making faces we love. Trying is winning. We’re all winners.

The Art Of The Reframe

If you start channeling Gordon Ramsey, try conjuring up Julia Child instead. To Gordon’s “WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?” respond with “THERE’S ALWAYS THE SALAD”.

Do Not Do

DO!

Try it and see if you don’t find yourself easing up a little bit…or a lot.

You would not expect a five year old to master faces in one sketch. Like a five year old trying something new, you have permission to suck.Sucking leads to not sucking with time, patience, and practice. Humour and kindness.

Humour and kindness.

Love you. See you again soon. xo

P.S. Interested in Moonshine? It’s still open for registration and coupon code effylove gets you $20 off.

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